How to Win Friends and Influence People

Lauzen is up to being Lauzen:

                                                                                                December 10,  2007

 

 

To the Editors and Congressman Hastert,

 

            Congressman Hastert, I respect you and appreciate your more than 25 years of public service.  As one of the recently most powerful men in America, I ask that, rather than taking a predominant role in the coming Republican Primary election by endorsing any individual, please let the people decide.

 

            Any candidate running for the Republican nomination to succeed you would feel honored by your endorsement.  However, out of respect for the people whom we all serve and for the future unity of the Republican Party in this area, I respectfully request that you remain neutral before the primary and support whomever the Republican voters select after the Primary on February 5, 2008.

 

            You have demonstrated through your recent action of early resignation that you wish to set aside the public duty to which we elected you.  At first, I was very concerned that your health was failing somehow, and I sympathized with you and your family.  But, you have assured us repeatedly that there is no health problem and we are relieved on your behalf.

 

            Many folks express their wonder to me about the apparent necessity to spend

$1 Million of taxpayer funds that could better be spent on national security, healthcare, or education, on the March 8, 2008 Special Election.  Now that you are stepping away from your official duties, I believe that citizens and voters would be distressed if you reassert yourself and use your considerable clout to influence the outcome of an impending primary.

 

            Most people to whom I listen are pretty sick these days of the results that have been produced by big money and big clout in Washington, D.C. and Springfield.  You can provide leadership by letting the people decide and using your very substantial experience and skills to coach your successor.  In this way, you are a winner no matter whom the people choose.

 

            Again, thank you for your service; we respect you.

 

                                                                                                Very sincerely,

 

 

 

                                                                                                Christopher J. Lauzen

 I believe the response forthcoming if fuck you too.