With Rauschenberger and Syverson

Good God, what where you thinking when you dialed his number!

We need to convince him to pull out of the race. He’s obviously not going to do it on his own, so we’re going to need to create a scandal. It has to be big and that means sex–the media eats that stuff up.

No time for private investigators. You have to do it yourselves–you broke it; you fix it. I’m thinking of a three way at a Cubs game. As for staging, the photos would look best with Sen. Syverson taking him from behind and Sen. Rauschenberger going down on him, but I guess that part is really up to you.

Once he’s out of the race, we convince Ted Nugent to run.

We’re depending on you to turn this thing around. Don’t disappoint us.

go read the whole thing….and the comments…

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