Austin Mayor will be doing his rendition of Uberweis, Uberweis to the tune of Edelweis.
OneMan will be providing aerial shots from a helicopter and telling us just how many illegal aliens can fit into the roundhouse complex.
Jake and Nat have drinks while Dave Dierson screams to no one in particular that Jake is part of the vast conspiracy to hide the IL GOP ethics statement and platform from the public. Jake attempts to talk to him and Dierson disappears with a poof of smoke.
Tom Tancredo and Phyllis Schafly will be claiming to provide moments of seriousness inbetween comedy routines, but really turn out to be the headliners.
Jack Roeser will leave his checkbook at home saying he’s too busy to pay. He’s a busy man, you know.
George Wendt will be outside actually being funny and supporting Birkett.
Pete Giangreco will pack the audience with Blagojevich supporters just to make sure people actually think this clown could pull off a primary win leaving Pete the second easiest job after Robert Gibbs was spokesperson for Obama in 2004. Leaving, he’ll make a reference of “I’m going to Disneyland…”